And They Call The Wind Hottie “Maria”…
Phew — we can finally close up that Amber Alert for [the previously missing for a week] Republican Governor Mark Sanford of South Carolina — the man is alive, well, sporting a nice tan and walking around with an extra skip in his step. It turns out the man wasn’t kidnapped by al-Qaeda after all. Nope, Governor Sanford was simply sowing some wild oats with a hottie by the name of “Maria” from Buenos Aires, Argentina — nothing more than a one-week fling to help guide him through his apparent midlife crisis. The man deserves both a break and a round of applause from ANY red-blooded American male, in my NOT so humble opinion.
In a way, and please bear in mind the fact that even though I’m HAPPILY married to Mrs. GTL™ (and thank God she rarely reads my columns insane rantings), I’m also a “godless” (just kiddin’ — I didn’t capitalize “God” on purpose on that last one) Liberal who sort of admires the former G.O.P. hope and a prayer to dethrone President Barack Hussein Obama in 2012 guts this guy had to simply sneak out the door and nail a gorgeous South American woman for a week while leaving his troubles behind. Sounds therapeutic to MOI (and yep — again — I am part French and surrender NO apologies for it). I might even be a slight bit jealous of the fact this guy had the power, influence and bucks to pull it off. Or not. Still struggling with that one…
In addition to all of the other accolades I’m willing to toss Governor Sanford’s (R) way, this man knows how to play “Killing Me Softly With His Song” via email (The State — H/T to MemeOrandum) better than anybody I could ever hope to in pursuit of a hot, week-long game of “Hide The Sausage” in “A Land Far, Far Away”. Talk about a CHARMER, folks. WOW. Thank you, Governor Sanford, for the free “How To Email A Target” lesson. What a sweet talker you are, Sir. I’m in AWE.
Wait, I cannot STOP heaping my sincere admiration upon Mark Sanford — this man has put on a CLINIC on how to sow those wild oats for a week without [serious] regret. His press conference today was a MAN’s man’s press conference. He shows back up from a week of tossing around in the sack with the hottie from Argentina for a week with his wife and family by his side. To paraphrase, he basically says “Doods — the chick was HOT, I needed some strange, I’m sorry, I’m only human and now I’m back to govern again. Did I mention I’m really sorry about this? A man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do!” (crocodile tears followed by racuous Applause). No “I’m going to rehab” B——-S. No “I pray for my God to have mercy upon my undeserving soul” crappola. My HERO.
Welcome back, Governor Sanford. I didn’t miss you a bit until you finished your “tell-all press conference”. Now I’m a HUGE fan.
***
Other bloggers opine — side of the aisle unimportant in this one: Michelle Malkin (Right) — one word — “BASTARD“; Drudge Retort (Left) — interesting (as always) discussion; The Raw Story (Left) continues with an active and interesting discussion as well; Andrew Sullivan of The Daily Dish points out the hypocrisy of these people is wearing thinly upon him at the speed of light…
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11:19 pm on June 24th, 2009 1
Hey! You are over your writers block! What is it Rahm said “Never let a scandle go to waste?” Something like that. Good to see you back in form.
And, by gawd, if Slick Willy and Teddy, and even old JFK can get away with it, by jingo, this guy should to. At least he didn’t have his secret service guys outside the door. Or keep her quite with an nice late night drive.
11:21 pm on June 24th, 2009 2
Don’t Cry for Him, Argentina…
Former 2012 presidential hopeful Mark Sanford revealed today that his cheatin’ heart, along with the rest of his body, had been having an affair with a woman from Argentina. This follows a rather strange week during which it was reported……
11:38 pm on June 24th, 2009 3
Thankya Joe!!! Yep — He’s my newest hero! I wish I was him for (last) week, bro!
8:47 am on June 25th, 2009 4
GTL
Here I was expecting a typical “evil hypocritical GOP’er” column. Well, you can imagine my surprise when you wrote this one. It’s been a while since I can say we are in complete agreement.
Of course, OTOH this idiot just flushed his political career down the crapper. I will suspend final judgement as to merits of this trade off pending photos of his “Latin Love”. I hope he chose more wisely than a certain former Senator from my state of residence, who chose poorly.
10:05 am on June 25th, 2009 5
GTL, I’m really happy to see your spirits lifted. I really try to avoid being just an “echo chamber” of right wing radio, but being you brought up God in your article, did you hear Rush’s joke about God and Obama? How are they alike? Neither have birth certificates, How are they different? God doesn’t think that He is Obama.
11:14 am on June 25th, 2009 6
It’s too bad Obama doesn’t know how to be a man like Sanford, and tell Americans the truth about his so-called “health care” plan.
12:31 pm on June 25th, 2009 7
Hey GTL,
My 2 cents from here in SC.
1) Plus – the week has not been boring. Sanford nearly doubled the size of our local newspaper to enhance my breakfast reading pleasure.
2) Don’t read to much into the buzz about Sanford as a former Pres hopefull. He had a strong libertarian streak that gave the local GOP fits. (why I liked him on several issues) He would not have made a national ticket – although he just enhanced his creditials for Secretary of State though – good foreign relations.
3) Negative – For SC. Sanfords allies here who really pushed to modernize our late 1800’s government will really lose ground here. Sanfords fall is a big plus for the “good old boy system” in our legislature which runs all 3 branches of government in this state.
Steve
3:14 pm on June 25th, 2009 8
Just once I woould to see one of these political wives grab the mike and say, I’m divorcing this two-timing sob just as soon as I can. I’ve already kicked him out of the govenor’s mansion…the white house….the 70,000 sq foot house…etc and if the the voters of this state, country, county, city don’t like it….tough shit.
Just once.
3:34 pm on June 25th, 2009 9
Gaia
According the reports here in NC, she had thrown his butt out. Seems she either found out or was tipped, and said enough is enough. I surmise that is because she is a conservative woman. A leftists woman like Liz Edwards or Hillary always seems to take the scoundrel back.
3:41 pm on June 25th, 2009 10
Gaia – and add “And thank GAWD someone else is sleeping with him – he’s a lousy lay!”