Hustler Publisher Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis Begging Congress For Five Billion Dollar Bailout For Adult Entertainment Industry
PLEASE keep the dangerous Republicans in check and approve the adult industry bailout proposed to Congress by Larry Flynt
However, HYPOTHETICALLY speaking, HAD it have been true our Great American Hero, Perverto Gonzales had already kicked the proverbial “bucket“, he WOULD have been rolling in his grave right now as adult entertainment “gurus” Larry Flynt and Joe Francis march on Washington, D.C., with their “Will Work For Bailout Bucks” signs (CNN’s Political Ticker).
For the sake of many of my fellow “gentlemen”, PLEASE, my fellow Americans, consider their request. An Internets, Blogospheres and Facebooks without P0rƝ is absolutely UNTHINKABLE and unacceptable.
Automotive industry bailouts? BOO-HISS. Mortgage company bailouts? BOO-HISS. Fanny Mae and Freddie Mac bailouts? BOO-HISS. Bank bailouts? BOO-HISS. I believe you probably get my point. However…
Allow the adult entertainment industry to go under and you only THINK you’ve seen the worse of our “Esteemed Leaders In Congress“.
For example, let’s just take the “Footsie Champion of The U.S. Senate“, Larry Craig (R); David Vitter (R) of D.C. Madam Fame; Mark Foley (R) of Jessica’s Law Underage-Male-Page-Gate fame; and even former “King Of Far-Right-Religious-Wacko-I-Think-I-Know-What-YOU-Did-Last-Night” fame, Reverend Ted Haggard (R) and so many other influential (so-called) “leaders” in the G.O.P. ranks would end up joining the ranks of their former “brothers in arms”, serial killer Ted Bundy (R), domestic terrorists Timothy McVeigh (R) and abortion clinic bomber, Eric Robert Rudolph (R). Just imagine how ghastly and “stressed” these guys would have been if P0rƝ on the Internets, the Blogospheres and the Facebooks were unavailable to them.
Just think about it before you all jump on the “Just Say No To ALL Bailouts” bandwagon, please. Without all of the above (with the exceptions of Mark Foley, Ted Haggard and Larry Craig, of course), who else would there be to keep Ashley Dupre in “bidness”?
The point is, obviously, we don’t need half of our 535 Congresscritters and Senators on The Hill suppressing this “art” such Great Americans as Larry Flynt, Joe Francis, and the rest of our creative Adult Entertainment entrepreneurs crank out on a regular basis. As taxpayers, it is a matter of public safety — we MUST bail out the P0rƝ industry, or face the consequences of one VERY suppressed side of the political aisle.
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Other bloggers weigh in: Ron Chusid of Liberal Values — Headline — “Porn Industry Needs Stimulus” (what else do you need to click on that one?); Ed Morrissey of Hot Air (Right) — Headline — “Shocker: World’s oldest profession not recession-proof” (see previous comment); Jules Crittenden (Right) agrees with me, i.e. “Why Not?”; McQ (Right) of QandO also agrees, i.e., “… I do appreciate the effort…”; William Tell of Pirate’s Cove (Right) breaks with the “Mark Foleys” of the Blogospheres and declares this to be “absurd“…
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12:41 am on January 8th, 2009 1
That is it, I’m calling Mom on your sorry ass!
So will HBO still have shows with naked scenes if they don’t get the bailout money? Just wondering so I can call the church and start a million man march… um should I say what side of this issue I’m on GTL?
These folks are just nuts, and for the female readers, umm delicates drying on the clothes line.
2:27 am on January 8th, 2009 2
ok ok, it is time for ALL of us to request some of the cake, just print this form and fax it to your preferred governement…:
http://mtblog.vanityfair.com/online/politics/2008/12/01/federalbailout.html
Cheers
Frank
2:53 am on January 8th, 2009 3
LMFAO @ Y’ALL!!! YOU are why this is my own personal favorite blog. Still laughing my fargin’ a## off
10:30 am on January 8th, 2009 4
[...] swear politics has entered the realm of @#$%& parody. I swear it will be hard to avoid limp excuses anymore. I swear even the most upright will [...]
10:47 am on January 8th, 2009 5
why not? Nobody said you have to be engaged in “moral business” to qualify for federal bailout!
1:04 pm on January 8th, 2009 6
“Moral Business”. Now there’s an oxymoron.
Don’t you just wanna squeeze Larry Flynt? (metaphorically, I mean) He never fails to make me smile.
2:13 pm on January 8th, 2009 7
Hell, the porn industry is symbolic of what politicians have been doing to We the People for decades – screwing us all.
2:58 pm on January 8th, 2009 8
So true Joe …
… we’ve even done the kinky stuff — taking a vicious pounding in all holes from the politicians, the drug companies and the insurance ’studs’.
It’s a wonder we can still walk straight. I need a cigarette just talking about it.
9:22 pm on January 8th, 2009 9
An aside here, Guns. Just today I started getting notices of spyware here on your site. You know anything about that? Do we maybe now have to worry about that midnight kick on the door?
11:41 pm on January 8th, 2009 10
LMFAO guys!!!!!!
Joe, it’s not spyware, just a cookie or two for the polls, etc.; very common. I also do have a “Stats” generator on the site, too, which may be another reason for the “spyware” warning but all it is is a way for me to track my stats without having to go to my web host all the time. That’s it, bro — not spying on anybody
12:02 am on January 9th, 2009 11
No spyware Gunny? Hmmm, then why the request for Avatars? Are they or are they not so you can pick us out of a lineup? I’m thinking you are secretly working for Homeland Security to get all of us bloogers and commentors in a covert roundup. Tell the truth, you are the big gun for the right wing to get all us lefty’s! Ya thats the ticket… LOL!
Do they have DSL hook ups at Guantanomo?
1:35 am on January 9th, 2009 12
Thank you. guys, for the first laugh I’ve had in days. And, no, you can’t forget us girls. If Flynt gets bailed out then there’s got to be money to bring back PlayGirl; and this time without the towels or covering hand on the centerfold. Burt Reynolds Lives!
2:34 am on January 9th, 2009 13
LMFAO AGAIN!!! Mat — Gaia — great points, all
3:15 am on January 9th, 2009 14
Thanks, Guns. I hadn’t had the popup warnings before and I havn’t changed anything. Maybe one of the updates made my virus whatyahoozit more sensitive.
Oh, lord! Now it is going to start humming Kumbyah. And start handing out brie.
1:02 pm on January 9th, 2009 15
It is the porn industry that knocked down the Iron curtain.
It is porn that is making the world free. People want their porn. People love porn. Porn will set us free.
Bail out PORN!
9:02 pm on January 9th, 2009 16
I hear ya Ole Blue! If this doesn’t get handled, then the (818) and the sidewalks of sunset Blvd. will be crowded overnight!
It’s got to be bad if the oldest profession is getting rocked and banged…no pun intended…heh
Have a wonderful NFL Weekend G and everyone!
SF